Hijab.

I tell myself I'm excited.
I tell myself I'm ready.
I tell myself it's now or never.

My heart tells me I'm devasted.
My heart tells me I'm anything but ready.
My heart tells me to rebel

against everything I believe to believe in.

I kick, scream, fight.

for the freedom to do as i please.
My heart agrees with my actions.

I was taught to think with my head, not my heart.
"Your heart does not  k n o w  what's best for you. Your heart only f e e l s  what's best for you."
Am I wrong to be perfectly fine with that?

I have no choice.
I will cover up.
I will do what's "best".
I will follow my mother's orders.
I will follow God's orders.
I will do what's best.

Everything I believe to believe in,
is what's best.


I hope.